The Greens of Jericho

Reviewer: Penny Lane Signed [Report This]
Date: 08 Jul 2008 5:22:17 PM Title: Chapter 7

 Another great chapter!

The scene between Heather and Jake, awkwardly trying to navigate the upstairs hallway, was funny. You capture that tense, so-many-things-unsaid atmosphere so well. I liked this line:

“No, I don’t mind. It looks better on you anyway.” The words tumbled out before Jake could stop them. Rein it in, Green.

I can really see their relationship progressing just the way you've described it in this story. They're drawn to each other in a sort of unconscious (or sometimes conscious) way, but they fight it whenever they realize it, for their own reasons.

I liked your version of the Heather-eats-a-burger scene, with a funny conversation among the members of the Green family and her. I really liked this line- there's so much humour but also a serious undertone:

Heather Lisinski was convinced she’d fallen in love as she chewed on her hamburger, savoring its flavor. Everything about it was perfect, from its fresh lettuce to the slightly smoky taste of the beef. Even the bun. Who’d have thought hamburger buns could be so delectable? The condiments only added to the burger’s perfection. The complement of onion rings and a glass of tea—with actual ice!—rounded out the meal.

Made me laugh, but also a profound thing, to consider what you used to take for granted. Growing up, I had these friends who visited my family every summer, and since they live really far north, beyond the road line, they didn't get a lot of fresh produce. It always amazed me to see how much they enjoyed the hamburger buns we'd have at our barbeque. They would say that the buns that were flown into their community were always really stale. I think sometimes these simple details can remind us just what we have (and would be especially meaningful in the post-bombs world of Jericho).

I understood where Emily was coming from here- and I really did feel for her when I read that she had been going from place to place, making quite the effort to find everyone else and not being able to find anyone. I know it's really Jake who had the chance to avoid the terrible way both Emily and Heather have to find out about their respective new arrangements with Jake. (Though I think you understand Jake really well- it seems like something he'd do.)

Still, of course, I was annoyed with Emily. I can't pretend otherwise. This is a Jake/Heather story, after all. But I did want to say that you handled all three characters so well. Emily is sympathetic in this scene, because it's easy to understand why she does what she does. She's conscious of the threat posed to her by her best friend, and feeling guilty for that, and understandably annoyed by Jake. So while I don't really want to see her succeed (as far as her hopes to be with Jake forever are concerned), I do feel for her. I really got that this was a painful scene for all involved. Oh, and I really liked this line:

Heather slid out of the booth, and Eric watched, grimacing. It was evident from the look on her face just a moment earlier that Jake never did get around to having that talk with Heather about Emily.

But now Eric was stunned to see Heather smiling brightly as she and Emily embraced.

For as long as he lived, he would never understand women.

Funny, and true.

The scene between Heather and Hamilton was a good contrast to the Jake/Emily conversation. Also, I really liked that Mary acknowleged her gratitude for what Heather did for Eric. It's kind of funny that Heather is linked to the Green family primarily because of Eric now and not Jake.

As usual, you've done an excellent job creating a scene in which all the characters have complicated motivations and interactions with each other.

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Author's Response:

Thank you, Penny!  This chapter was actually one of the more difficult chapters to write thus far because there are so many characters with different motivations.  Keeping that straight and staying true to the essence of the characters is not always an easy task.  I'm glad it came across okay.

You make a good point about things that we take for granted.  I sometimes think back to that scene early on in season 1 when the Green family is sitting at the dinner table and talking about the food items they miss most. Heehee...I was glad to include the Greens in the hamburger scene rather than Major Beck. 

Strangely enough, I do feel for Emily in this situation.  However, her insecure comments are only having the effect of creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.  If she reacts irrationally because she thinks that Jake is suddenly going to dump her for Heather, she may very well be setting the stage for such an event.  I tried to imagine what it would be like to know someone for as long as Jake and Emily have, love that person, and still never be able to make the relationship work.  Emily isn't only a graduate from the school of hard knocks, I'd say she was valedictorian.  With that said, she and Jake have a larger issue between them than Heather, and that is trust.  Alas, Emily doesn't seem willing to put her trust entirely in Jake but she's very willing to put demands on him.

Hamilton is very much my anti-Jake.  He's easy going, cheerful, and uncomplicated.  I've had fun writing his character.  He and Heather do play well off one another, but there is certainly a different dynamic at work than the one she has with Jake.