The Greens of Jericho

Reviewer: Penny Lane Signed [Report This]
Date: 08 Jul 2008 9:16:24 PM Title: Chapter 8

 Once again, you've written some wonderful interactions between characters in this chapter.

Hamilton is really starting to grow on me. I feel like he has a totally different energy than Jake. I'll be interested to see what else he reveals about himself over time. It's so funny how Heather can handle herself around him, throwing out the witty, flirtatious comebacks and not putting her foot in her mouth very often (because, of course, he is different than Jake). I like the insight he seems to have into the other characters, and the casual, unassuming sort of way he lets us know about it.

I especially liked this line:

“So she looked pretty upset with Jake, and he looked distant from her.”

“Oh, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.”

Hamilton leaned down and whispered in her ear one word. “Liar.”

Again, I love the humour you insert into every part of this story. This made me laugh:

Maybe he could parlay that into something more lasting, a book entitled 101 Ways to Screw Up Your Life. He’d certainly had expert experience.

I loved the scene where Mary gives Jake her 'expert' opinion and goads him into getting up on the dance floor. It was an interesting contrast to the scene between Heather and Hamilton. I loved how blunt she could be with Jake, and how he could still pretend (out loud, at least) that her observations are wrong. It's funny how everyone else (Gail, Eric, Mary, Hamilton, and even perhaps Emily) have a clearer impression of what's happening between Jake and Heather than they do themselves, but I guess that often happens in life. I loved this exchange:

She shrugged, playing off his irritation. “You don’t have to say anything. Just thought you might appreciate a change in topic, that’s all. Eric was very excited to have Heather back in town.”

“We all are,” Jake agreed. “She’s one of a kind.”

“She sure is. I’m guessing you may not have a roommate for long. Some young buck—and there are plenty around here—is going to snatch her up.”

“Goodnight, Mary,” Jake replied setting the glass down on the bar with force.

She watched as Jake stalked to the dance floor. A knowing smile spread across her features as she emerged from behind the bar and walked over to the jukebox. That was too easy.

The dance between Jake and Heather was so well written. It was sweet, sensual, and full of emotional turmoil. You did a great job taking us through what each of them was thinking as they alternately stumble upon the truth and put up their own barriers. I loved when Jake came to this realization:

In fact, he’d felt emotionally disconnected with everyone until yesterday in the middle of an argument with Major Beck when he saw the slight figure of Heather Lisinski walk into the major’s office. She brought with her something Jake hadn’t felt in the months since her absence: hope.

Great chapter!

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Author's Response:

Thanks so much for your comments, Penny!  I'm glad you're enjoying Hamilton.  He's been a lot of fun to write, and you're correct that he does put out a different energy compared to Jake. 

Good observation about the difference between the way Heather handles herself with Hamilton and the way she handles herself with Jake.  Hamilton is, I think, representative of safety.  He's great to be around, very easy going, genuinely a good guy, and unlikely to break Heather's heart. Jake, on the other hand, is a bit like a flame with Heather playing the role of moth.  She can't help but want to be around him, but she knows that as things stand at this point, if she gets too close, she's going to get burned. 

Everyone around them seems to see that Jake and Heather are drawn to one another, but it's taking Jake and Heather longer to be willing to act on that.  Mary certainly played a key role in Jake stepping up to the plate, but while Jake is finally starting to realize just what Heather means to him, it doesn't make the situation any easier for him. 

Thank you again for your comments.  I've enjoyed reading your observations so much.