Jake arrived at the med centre. It looked similar to the rest of the town. A rusted ambulance with no doors stood out conspicuously near the side entrance, the sign above the clinic doors was broken, and he narrowly avoided stepping in what seemed to be vomit as he walked across the sidewalk. The building was noticeably without power. Though it was day time, his eyes had to adjust as he went inside.
It was quieter than it had been on all of his previous visits. People lay in beds, or sat in chairs, coughing, and sometimes moaning. He asked a tired looking boy, who couldn't have been more than fifteen, where he could find Gail or Eric Green. He pointed him towards one of the patient rooms.
Jake knocked on the closed door, terrified and desperately needing to see. He heard his mother's voice.
“Just a minute.”
“Mom, I'm home.”
There was silence for a moment, then her footsteps. The door flung open and Gail Green appeared, her whole face wild. Her eyes were huge as she took in the sight of her son standing a few feet away.
“Jake? It's you!” She rushed forward, and grabbed him, pulling him into her arms. They stood there for a long time, Gail holding her son to her. She finally pulled back so she could look at him.
“I knew you were out there, somewhere. I knew it. All this time.” She beamed at her eldest son, and he couldn't help but grin back.
“Well, here I am. In the flesh.”
She gave him a brief scolding look, then smiled again. “Don't make jokes. Jake, I've dreamed this before. I always woke up and wondered where you were.”
“I know Mom,” he said huskily, afraid his own eyes might soon become as teary as hers.
“Look at you,” she said, her eyes surveying the damage she was imagining he had sustained in the far away place he'd been.
He was thinking the same thing about her. She looked as worn out and tired as he'd ever seen her. Her clothes, her hair, everything but her smile at seeing him had faded.
“Let's go tell your brother the good news,” she said, grabbing his hand. In that moment, he could see her the way she used to be, before everything around them had crumbled. She pulled him down the hall, towards April's old office. There, lying asleep on the couch, was Eric. His hair was scraggly and unkempt and it looked as though he hadn't shaved in weeks.
Gail bent over her younger son, gently shaking his arm. “Eric, honey, wake up. See who just got here.”
Eric moaned, pulled away, and pulled the hospital blanket tighter, but as his mother shook him some more, he startled awake.
“What? What is it?” He looked around quickly, then slowly took in his mother's beaming face.
“Over here, Eric,” said Jake with a small smile.
Eric stared at him, an almost horrified look on his face. Remembering what his mother had said about awakening, Jake almost felt sorry for his brother. “I'm really here. No dream.”
“Jake?” he asked groggily. He sat up, slowly processing what was going on. “Jake?” he asked again. Jake just nodded patiently.
Eric bolted out of bed, rushed over, and grabbed his brother in a hug. Jake felt the air being squeezed out of his lungs.
“How did you get here? When did you get here? What have you been doing all this time?” He was firing a million questions at once, but his voice was getting suspiciously shaky.
His mother took charge. “It's okay, Eric. We have lots of time to talk about that. First we should get Jake some food, and he must be tired-”
“Mom, I'm fine. I already ate. Stopped in at Bailey's.” He held out the jar of antiseptic. “Mary sends her regards.”
He carefully eyed Eric, who swallowed uncomfortably. His mother didn't notice, and asked “How is Mary? And how is Mimi doing?”
Jake gave a non-committal shrug. He didn't like the worry deeply etched around his mother's eyes. “They're okay. Mary told me about how things have been.”
Gail raised her eyebrows slightly. “You know?”
He nodded. She was silent a moment, her face moving in slow motion as if she were wrestling to keep something at bay. “Well, we'll have time to talk about that later too. I want to get you some clean clothes. We've got showers, but I'm afraid they're cold. I can't imagine you got much food at that bar, not that we have much either, but I'm sure I can-”
Jake took her hands in his, interrupting again. “I'm fine, Mom. I'm just glad to be back. What I want is to know everyone's okay. Why don't we go home? We can talk.”
Gail looked flustered. “We can't leave here. We've got patients.”
He was surprised. His mother cared greatly about the people in their town, but she almost always put family first. Especially when they came back from the dead.
“Jake, how about I get you some fresh clothes?” asked Eric. “Come on.”
Jake almost rolled his eyes- he'd washed these clothes just the day before yesterday. They were, of course, accepting the idea that he'd been on a long trip. The urgency in Eric's less than subtle hint made him follow him.
“Why can't we go home? I've been gone a long time and I want to see it.” He looked to Eric, not challenging him, only wanting the information.
“We don't go home, Jake. This is where we have to be now, and this is where we stay. You're right, you have been gone a long time.” Jake had wondered if the old conflicts he and his brother had tried to put to rest would surface again here, but Eric didn't seem resentful as much as weary.
“I heard what happened here- to April. I'm sorry.” He tried to convey how genuine his feelings were.
Eric was staring towards the wall, but it was as though he were looking far away. “It killed her. Having to watch them come here, suffer, die. She did everything she could, but they died just the same. You know, when a rainstorm came from Denver, right after the bombs, they found out the fallout shelter here in the clinic was no good. We couldn't fit everyone in the other one, at town hall, and it was a lot of her patients that got left here. She stayed. I begged her to come, but she stayed with them. It turned out the rain wasn't radioactive- no one died because of it. But at the time...”
“So the others, the people you couldn't fit in the shelter, they just stayed at the med centre?” Jake remembered well the chaos that had pervaded the town that day, as they'd scrambled to make everyone safe.
“Yeah,” said Eric, wincing. “I'd say that was the beginning of the end for Dad. He was sick too. Couldn't take charge of the situation. Gray tried- he wasn't much help. Things were crazy already, because there was a missing school bus. The sheriff and his men went looking for it, and ended up missing themselves. Total chaos.”
“What happened? What did Dad do about the bus?”
Eric took what looked like a painful breath. “It was a tough decision to make- get everyone we could sheltered from the fallout, and hope for the best with the bus, or send people looking, knowing it could lead to their deaths? There was this crowd gathered outside, and they got all riled up. The parents waited it out, hoping for news from the sheriff. Then, the rain was coming. The parents, of course, decided they couldn't leave their children out there. It looked like they were all going to go, but when they split up to get ready, some of them were talked out of it. They should make themselves safe, and hope their children might be finding shelter somewhere too. Better chance of reuniting. So some parents went, others stayed.”
“Did they find the bus?” Jake asked, not liking the tone Eric's voice had taken.
“Not for two days. The parents who went out sat in the cars during the rain, terrified they were dying of radiation poisoning and hoping their children were somewhere else.”
“So what happened? To the bus, I mean,” asked Jake.
“They'd hit a deer. Bus driver died.”
Jake took a shaky breath. Of all the events he'd known would change, this was one he hadn't wanted to think about. “They survived the rain, though? It wasn't radioactive?”
“Yeah, the rain was alright. Not all of them survived though.” Eric paused. Part of Jake wanted to tell him it was alright not to finish. He knew he couldn't. Eric resumed. “One of the kids died in the crash. After the crash, April thought. Neck injury. Two of the kids went for help. We never found them. Another kid was dead, with a head injury. We're not sure, but we think he tried to stand up to some criminals. See, there was a crashed prison bus out there too. We think the prisoners gained control after the accident, and one of them killed the sheriff and two deputies. We don't know how many, but some of them found the school bus. They might have just wanted to get out of the rain, but something happened. Dangerous looking men with weapons come on your bus, what are you going to think? We tried to question the kids, find out exactly what went on, but none of them wanted to talk, and their parents were so furious, most refused to let us question them. Can't say I blame them.”
Jake felt his own chest being crushed. This was the worst thing he could imagine. Stacy was dead. Not just her, others. Other kids who had been alive, talking loudly, helping him put together straws from their lunchboxes. Those two from the road- the kid who asked if he was a soldier. Gone forever.
He was even more afraid to ask the next question, and he tried to keep the waver out of his voice. “What about their teacher? Where was the teacher in all this?”
Eric spoke carefully. “They found her just outside the bus. She was beat up pretty bad. I guess she was standing when the bus crashed, because she broke her leg. She wouldn't talk about it either. We think she tried to protect the kids from the prisoners- and she got them to move to the back. She couldn't move herself, couldn't even climb back in the bus during the rain. I had to tell her we couldn't find the kids- the ones she sent for help. Next to April, and Dad, that was one of the worst moments...”
Eric kept talking, about the early days after the bomb, how people had erupted in anger and despair after the bus and the rain, the fires and the attacks from intruders. Jake was lost in his own terrors. That night on the bus had seemed a blur lately, something simple and straightforward from another time, but right now he could remember each of their faces, clear as day. The children's shouts that had pulled him out of his own world, alerted him to the others that needed him. The many scared sets of eyes in the rows of seats. How terrible it had been to see another little girl dying in front of him. That thing that had kicked in inside of him, that had forced him out of his own mind and into the situation, doing what needed to be done. How it had been to see her eyes open again. The most beautiful sight in his life.
Driving back, fearing something would go wrong, but hoping they'd be safe soon. And he remembered Heather, wincing and teaching the kids left from right.
He thought about the criminals again. The two from Richmond Ranch. He had never thought about others, out there on the road that night, making their way over to a second crashed bus. He even thought for a moment about what had might have happened if he had found the prison bus instead of the school bus.
He remembered the moment he'd climbed aboard the bus, their terrified eyes. Had they looked this way at the escaped prisoners too?
He felt his eyes burning, dangerously close to spilling over. It was sudden, unexpected, and he wiped at his face furiously. He felt a hand on his arm.
“I know, Jake.” Eric was comforting him. Eric had been talking about Johnston Green's last days as mayor. He had been telling him how it had been when the town turned against their father, and how different it had been with him gone. He thought Jake was crying for their dead father, something Jake had done many times already. Jake was glad his brother couldn't tell his mind was actually on the school bus.
They sat for a few moments, Jake letting the tears slide down his face and Eric awkwardly patting his arm. Jake took a shaky breath, and said in a husky voice “Do you mind getting me those clothes now?”
Eric nodded, saying “Sure,” softly and disappearing down the hallway.
Jake sat holding his head in his hands. I can't stay here. I can't keep thinking about them, dead. I just saw some of them the day before Bonnie died. They were planting flowers outside the library.
I know, this is rough Jake, but you're not done. You still have to see the ones that lived.
Before Jake could silently ask his guide what he meant, Eric was back with the clothes. Jake took them silently and went to change in a vacant room. Eric had given him jeans and a t-shirt. His own clothes. 'Eric must be keeping his clothes here too.'
He does. Have you realized yet he lives here?
'What about our house? All our stuff? They just gave it up?'
Your mom stops in, when she makes her errands, once a week.
“Eric, does Mom ever get out of here?” he asked as he came back into the hall. Better to voice a concern about their mother than about Eric himself.
“Yeah, she does some stuff around town, usually once every week or two. Even after everything that's happened, she still tries to help people.”
“Can't we stop in at home then? I can go with her, we can get her errands done.”
Eric shook his head. “She won't leave today. We have a bunch of people here with chest coughs.”
He said it as if it were a warning, and Jake would be better to let it rest. “Well, maybe I could do them for her,” Jake supplied. “I could stop in at home, and get anything you need.”
“I don't know if she'll let you run her errands. She likes to have a handle on everything she normally looks after. You won't know what to do.”
“Yes I will,” he protested. “I know this town as well as you. I'm sure it's not any more difficult to navigate than the places I've seen.”
“What are you boys arguing about? You've only been together five minutes.” Gail had opened the door and was frowning at them, but she had a twinkle in her eye that showed them she was joking. It was like a moment from the past, bringing her out of her real life for just a second.
“Nothing Mom,” said Eric, throwing a glance at Jake.
“I want to see the house,” said Jake, gently but firmly.
She smirked. “Is that all? Well, go on ahead. Back door's unlocked.”
He looked at her, puzzled. She was being the most cheerful he'd seen her since he had arrived in this bizarre place. “Mom, are you okay? I can stay here with you for awhile.” He reached out to her.
“No, Jake, you should go see the house. Get yourself set up there. You don't have to stay here with us, I know volunteering isn't your thing. I just want to see you again. You can come back here when you're done. You will, right?” Her eyes were getting suspiciously shiny again.
“Yeah, of course,” he said, reaching out to hug her.
A few minutes later, Jake was walking towards the front door, surrounded on either side by his mother and brother. Gail hugged her long lost son again, holding on so long Jake thought they might be standing there for the rest of the day. Finally, he whispered “I'll be back again, Mom.”
“Come for dinner. We'll have something together,” she said. She looked into his eyes again, as if trying to memorize his face. “Oh, you can take the soup to Heather.” She rushed inside, leaving Jake to stare at Eric.
It was the first time he'd heard her name. He tried to sound casual as he asked “Who's that?”
Eric looked grim again. “Remember the teacher I told you about? From the school bus accident? She was one of April's causes. Mom's taken her on now. Leaves food outside her house every now and then, tries to make sure she's still alive. If you take the food, be careful. Just leave it out front.”
Before Jake could rearrange his face enough to ask casually why he'd have to be careful, Gail was outside again, giving him a container. “I made soup today; we had a little extra. And can you drop these jars off at Bailey's?” She handed him a bag to put everything in, quickly explaining directions to the house.
“Okay,” said Jake, a little flustered, balancing the soup as he loaded the jars into the bag.
“Maybe I will come by the house later,” said his mother, casually, though not lost on her sons. “If you're all set up, maybe we could all have dinner there.”
“Sounds good, Mom,” he said, quickly kissing her on the cheek and hugging Eric again. He went quickly, before the look on his mother's face made him want to stay. He could barely stand to leave them there, looking so sad as they watched him go, but he had a new worry now that he had to investigate.